What do we do?
Firstly, remember to breathe!
“I’m pregnant” These are the most exciting, overwhelming, emotional and terrifying words I think I have ever muttered!
Max was planned, yet it still felt like an enormous surprise to both of us when that test came back positive! I couldn’t believe it, the reality of becoming parents and actually being pregnant was overwhelming, I still struggle to describe the feeling, the emotion I felt, but I’ll try! Imagine you have chosen to ride the steepest, highest roller coaster in the world (even though you are scared stiff of heights) after over indulging in Willy Wonka’s chocolate heaven. That feeling of excitement, nervousness, blind panic and sickness all rolled into one! It was a bit like that.
I had so many questions like, What happens next? What is happening/going to happen to my body? What do I need? When do I tell everyone? When do I tell everyone? How do I tell everyone? Do I need to change my diet? Where do I start?
My biggest top tip, take one thing at a time and go with the flow. Enjoy it!
I knew that starting a family would be a huge learning curve and I like to think that before I had Max, I had done my homework, I read as many books and blogs on how to be the ‘perfect’ Mum (I know that there is no such thing but I still wanted to be one!). I’m sure I also drove my husband and family mad, relaying all this theoretical research on what we should do, what we should buy and so on. However, this ‘homework’ does definitely not prepare you for the real thing or make you any kind of ‘perfect’ Mother. It does however put your mind at rest during the pregnancy and it breaks the process down into smaller steps that make the journey more relaxed. Parenting is definitely a ‘learn on the job’ kind of thing.
One thing I have learnt is that everyone (and I mean everyone, including strangers you meet in Tesco) have their own advice, own ideas and own opinions. Everyone knows best! I am guilty for it now, everyone gets so excited and carried away when someone is having a baby that they want to share everything they found helpful and not so helpful. You can’t follow them all. It is important to find your way. Listen to others, read books, blogs, websites of course, but don’t compare yourself to others, don’t try and do everything. Don’t let others advice confuse you, annoy you, stress you out or go against what you believe in! This is your journey, everyone does it differently, things change, advice changes and only you know what is best for your baby and your family. Trust yourself and enjoy every step.
Books we found helpful;
However by far the most helpful for me was to talk to others; friends, family, even strangers! I know that sounds a bit odd but bare with me, I signed up to the Babycentre website. Not only does this website give you lots of information about pregnancy but you can also sign in to their community and join the birth club for your due date. This will link you up with other Mum’s who are going through the same things as you, at exactly the same time. I found this group a huge support, I could ask them anything and the majority of the people on there were supportive, friendly and non-judgement. In fact, they are still a huge support to me now. After we all had our babies, a few members of the group set up a closed Facebook group for the ‘majority’ of our group. We still use this now, two years down the track! Many of the Mum’s are on their second little one now!
If you have a few spare pennies, you can also join NCT groups or Daisy Birthing groups. I have heard lots of good things about these groups too. I personally can’t comment as I didn’t join them, but I have many friends that did, look out for their guest blogs soon.
Hopefully there are a few things in this blog to help you get your head around being pregnant. Stay tuned to find out more about deals and websites you can use to make that cash go a little bit further.